NewsLink Briefs

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Benito here. Randy is off again. So I guess I should write something. AAAAhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. It hurts my hands to write.

Here is something I find this week in the paper.

“A sense of grievance spilling into rage has gripped some GOP events this week as McCain supporters see his presidential campaign lag against Obama. Some in the audience are making it personal, against the Democrat. Shouts of “traitor,” “terrorist,” “treason,” “liar,” and even “off with his head” have rung from the crowd at McCain and Sarah Palin rallies, and gone unchallenged by them.”

And I just want to say you have a lovely country here but I’m getting a little afraid to go out in public.  Yesterday I heard someone say they would go to Mexico and take some of my friends North while they were having siestas.  Then leave them in Nebraska so when they wake up they run into Canada.

They all laughed but it is not so funny.  Everybody is very mad.   Friskeena sometimes starts yelling about Benny and throwing stuff around the house.

People are being afraid of many things and now they are mad too.   But this McCain guy starts talking all this trash about Senator Obama and then when everyone starts yelling about it he says he’s going to be alright as President.

It’s very confusing.  Old people should not run for President.  They are confused.  It’s like they wake up In Nebraska and drive to California.   Then they think they find the boat to Martha’s Vineyard.

Oh Oh.  Someone is outside the door.  Maybe it’s Friskeena.  Or it could be John McCain and some guys who want to go to Montana.  I better hide.

Randy will be back tomorrow.  I think he’s out on the Interstate looking for Lorelle.  He better be careful or someone will try to take him to Florida.

How bad off can this country be at the moment?   They still have plenty of money for gas.  And the price is coming down faster than Friskeena can fly to the Helmut City Revue on a Friday nite.

Got to go.

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It’s time for some News Briefs boys and girls but before we start I would just like to thank everyone. Yesterday as you have probably heard three tornadoes ripped through Virginia. No one was killed. But there were injuries and a lot of cars will never see the road again except from the back of a tow truck.

In any case “Thanks” for all the emails that I have come in asking if your blogging guy was doing alright. I haven’t read any of them yet but I can see them lined up in my Gmail account under BlogCatalog, Google Alerts and Sploofus.

Oh wait! Where did they go? I’m sure I saw them this morning when I got up. I was sitting right here trying to pry my left eye open. It gets stuck sometimes.

Maybe I dreamed about it. I had a dream that Seth Godin emailed me and said he liked my blogs so much he wanted to link to every post I ever did. What a nightmare!

Actually I didn’t even know we had survived Tornadoes in this area last night until I went out this morning and heard the news on my car radio. That Brian guy on Fox and Friends was talking about it.

When they give away an Emmy for the most irritating person on television I hope he gets it. Because he deserves it. He really thinks he’s funny and he’s not. Of course maybe we have the same problem and that’s why I can’t listen to him for long. We are just like a couple of magnets with the same poles pushed together.

What a mess. Hopefully those who are in critical condition will recover. The only good news is that the drought we were having is now over. It has been raining a lot.

In other news Brazil has called off its search for a priest who vanished while floating over the Atlantic with a cluster of party balloons. The Reverend Antonio de Carli has been missing since April 20th when he lifted off from a southern port city Paranagua strapped to 1,000 helium filled balloons.

I find these circumstances most unfortunate. Clearly this was a priest with a sense of fun.

I can see him flying through the clouds when suddenly a flock of birds spotted all the brightly colored balloons and decided there might be something good to eat inside their bright exteriors.

“Pop” went the first balloon and Father de Carli suddenly realized his journey was going to take him a lot farther than he had anticipated. He was going to go all the way to the Pearly Gates.

And he was going to get there in record time.

Congratulations Father! Here are your wings. Now you can really fly.

And that’s all we have for now News Brief readers. Today’s report has been about things that sometimes fly through the air.

Trees

Cars

Cows

Roofs

Father de Carli.

Hopefully everyone will stay on the ground for awhile.

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The White House is floating a new climate proposal these days. And No I am not trying to be funny. There was a cool film made a few years ago that showed some results of global warming. Much of the East Coast was under water and stuff was floating away.

Can the White House float in such an environment? I don’t know. But I’m sure there are a lot of politicians who can float really well. They will float out to sea.

Or maybe the sea will even come to them. Then they can float to Albany, New York or Harrisburg, Pennsylvania. Whatever floats their boats! Teddy might want to consider taking a plane however.

He has not floated well in the past.

In any case the White House proposed some things and some Republicans got mad and accused it of “appeasement”. And then the White House broke and ran.

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